Like a billion other suckers, I made a commercial to help advertise the most ubiquitous condiment on earth.
Hmm… looking at it now, I have a feeling this entry may not even get in. But please, watch and enjoy. And rate it 5 stars as often as you can. Thanks, fifteen readers!
Also, here’s me enlightening Todd about the highly complex process of video production:
Todd: It would take a computer programmer to explain it.
TimToon: Okay, let's say X is your education, and Y is your skill. Let's both assign them a value of NULL.
Todd: I'm with ya so far.
TimToon: Set up a while loop incrementing them until either one equals Success or you hit 32, then exit.
Todd: Wow, I'm gonna kill you.
And he’d be right to! Can’t wait for this exchange to show up on bash.org!
I’m back with another installment of Emergency 411 — the answer guide with all the answers. In this episode, experience the joy and potential financial windfall that comes with having a baby.
Don’t let the fact that I’ve never fathered a baby have any bearing on my credentials in this matter. By now you should already know not to take my advice.
Sometimes it’s important to stop and smell the nicotine.
As a consumer of internet comedy, it always seemed like something was missing. Then I realized: the video just wasn’t big enough. That’s why I’m presenting my latest as 1080i high definition video. Yes, there are a lot of comedy videos online, but it seems like everybody always has the same complaint: “Sure it’s funny, but will it fill my 60″ flatscreen?”
So check out my latest video, “A Quick Smoke”, in needlessly high definition. You know, for the the HDTV you don’t have.
You can find the standard-definiton version, as well as a heap of other spiffy videos over at my friends’ site Weak Nights.
Information on how to build (and detonate!) your own thermonuclear device — on the cheap.
Posted on Mar. 29, 2007 · Tagged with
I tell ya, Green Man’s Burden.
You work your ass off at the high-energy physics lab, trying to buy the good life for your mouthy, hippie girlfriend, only she doesn’t respect you, she’s too busy “rebelling” against her military brass father. Maybe he didn’t hug her enough as a kid, so now she’s taking it out on him by protesting his corrupt military-industrial corporation. The very military contractor you work for. And to top it all off, on the one day you get bombarded with a lethal dose of gamma radiation, you find out your company just cut your healthcare.
It just makes you so… so… snide.
See what happens when a guy who couldn’t take it anymore… takes it A LITTLE MORE!
SEE the comic book that I lost the originals to!
READ the script with all my co-writer’s best jokes cut out!
Three “original” stories:
Copyright-infringing action!
Hulk think never going back to Cartoon Network after making friends with girl you pitch show to must be road to success!
Oops.
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