i can has parking space?

If you’ve talked to me for even five minutes, then you must’ve had to sit patiently while I harangued you with unmitigated FURY over how EVERY NIGHT I have to park on the street like a common, miserable serf. Well L@@K here, I just got one less thing to bitch about:

“When Alexander saw the breadth of his domain,
he wept for there were no more worlds to conquer.”

I don’t know what there is left to achiece in this life once a person gets his or her own parking spot; maybe the only thing is to get a planet named after you.

And if you hadn’t yet heard of the site where I got my horrible pidgin english, then congratulations I’ve just made you a LOLot dumber.

There’s no way to emphasize in July

Two weeks without posting anything is kinda irresponsible of me.

For those waiting with bated breath, I can assure you that another Emergency 411 segment is on the way. Still, in the process of creating a 30-second cartoon, I can’t leave well enough alone and feel compelled to sift through multiple takes of audio for the one that just emphasizes everything just right.

It reminds me of Orson Welles, at one time the director of the greatest film ever made, who later in his career expelled his creative energy trying to hit the sweet spot on a commercial voice over for a can of peas.

But first a little background. Orson Welles, director of Citizen Kane and War of the Worlds, each a milestone in film and radio, is perhaps better known for his late career work shilling for Paul Masson wines.

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I am the light of the world

I just had a religious experience. Or, at least as close as I’m going to get to one.

It was over a TV program called “The Sun” — a show so minor, The Science Channel doesn’t even have a web page for it. In it, Dr. Paul Scowen of Arizona State University described the simple process by which our universe went from a soup of positively-charged quanta of energy, each orbited by its own negatively-charged, smaller unit of energy, to you at this very moment reading these words. Stopping to consider that, I was reminded of just how elegant and beautiful the universe is. And it all started with a cloud of atoms.

It will sit there for thousands, and in some cases, millions of years… What you need to do to get the star formation process going is you need to kick it with something. That can be an impact on the cloud from one side by a supernova blast wave — a massive star has gone boom at the end of its life, and that sends out in all directions, very energetic compression waves that hit the gas and compresses it.

The first stars formed out of dense clouds of hydrogen. Then, when they died, their supernovas sent out shockwaves to jumpstart the creation of another generation of stars. It’s a perfectly simple method for increasing complexity in the universe, and it all runs automatically!

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