Hey, can you spare some change?

When asked this by a panhandler, what are my options? A shrug, a sneer… but still one is left with a small degree of guilt for not complying with the situation a complete stranger has imposed upon you. Until now. My friend Nick has crafted the perfect response which is not only a brilliant example of flipping the script, it is sublime in its dickishness:

“No; can you spare some change?”